A New Blessing

I’m an auntie again! Last Friday my youngest sister Birgitta finally had her baby girl after a very long labor. Since my sister lives in Michigan and I live in Florida, I haven’t held my new little niece yet. But the texts were flying back and forth all weekend and it’s been great to see the pictures and know that both Birgitta and baby Emerald Louisa are happy and healthy. They’re home from the hospital now and my mom says they’re already so bonded that Emerald basically lives in Birgitta’s arms.

I think it’s fascinating the way God often uses children and relationships to teach women about His sovereign control in our lives. I’ve heard many friends say things like, “I always wanted to be married and have three kids by age 30,” or “My plan was to finish school, have a few years to be on my own, then get married in my late twenties,” or “I wanted to have one boy and one girl, spaced three years apart.” And then of course, reality unfolded in a completely different way. A broken relationship, infertility, miscarriage. A special needs child or twins. Or maybe a surprise pregnancy, like my sister Birgitta’s. We can make our plans, but God directs our steps.

Family life can be mysterious, the way it’s somewhat a matter of our choices, but then somehow still under God’s control. Why does He sometimes bless us with happy marriages and healthy children, but not always? I could spend hours analyzing it and I’d probably end up more confused than ever. And that makes me wonder if I’m asking the wrong question.

I think God puts dreams for the future in our hearts and He cheers for us as we pursue them. But lately I’ve been thinking about a different sort of pursuit, one that has nothing to do with what happens to me. Pastor Colin Smith is currently preaching a series on Matthew 5, pointing out the qualities God blesses in His people, things like humility and meekness. “These are the things God calls us to go after!” Pastor Colin says.

God is big enough to care about even the smallest details in our lives. But I think He wants my attention to be more on what kind of person I’m becoming rather than my specific circumstances. Whether my family is large or small, am I working to cultivate the gentle and quiet spirit that God says has “great worth” in His eyes? Whether I live in Florida or Michigan, am I setting my mind on things above? Whether my marriage is easy or hard, am I walking in humility the way God says I should?

My sister didn’t plan to become a mother right now. She was halfway through school and intended to finish her degree at the University of Iowa, not move into my mom’s house in Michigan and have a baby. But I’ve never once heard her complain about it. She’s received little Emerald as a gift from God and every day she’s making sacrifices out of love for her daughter. I’m so proud of her.

And I can’t wait to cuddle baby Emerald myself in December!