Look at this boatload of kids!
On Wednesday my friend Brandi and I took our kids to the Florida Museum of Natural History in Gainesville (which, by the way, is toddler-friendly and FREE except for parking). When we got to the dugout canoe exhibit, the kids all climbed into a boat together, and suddenly it seemed like we had, well, a whole lot of kids between us. Brandi’s probably more used to a crowd than I am since four of these six are hers. But as we’re both expecting babies in February, she’ll soon have five kids and I’ll have three—two more little ones to squeeze into the boat.
I grew up in a family of nine so my childhood was mostly a chaotic, happy mess. I loved it. And I always hoped I would be a mom someday myself and have a bunch of babies of my own. I’m beyond thankful God’s allowed me to live my dream. But here’s the thing: I didn’t know how hard it would be to raise children. I never envisioned myself raising my voice (which I do). Or struggling not to be angry and impatient with my kids (which I am). Or literally counting down the minutes till bedtime (guilty).
If I’m so happy with the family God’s given me, why do I sometimes struggle to be a happy mama? I don’t know the answer to that, but I’m guessing it probably has something to do with my sinful, selfish nature.
Sometimes though, everything is just right. The kids have fun exploring the museum with their friends and no one has a meltdown. Or I’ll pull Micah into my lap and instead of immediately wanting to get down, he’ll lean forward to give me a kiss. And another, and another (his kisses always come in multiples). Or Sky will announce “I’m having a good attitude, Mommy!” and offer a toy to Micah.
I know, I know. I should be joyful no matter what, even when my kids are fussy. I have some work to do in that area. But don’t worry. God presents me with plenty of opportunities to grow in patience every day. I hope that over time I can learn to be content in any circumstance. But heaven forbid I start thinking my life is all challenges. The truth is God gives me plenty of happy moments every day with my kids, and I’m not going to let them skip past me unnoticed. I’m going to take pictures of them, dwell on them, and let them overshadow a few temper tantrums in my memory.
Sometimes late at night, Adam and I will laugh about the funny, sweet things our kids do. And as I drift off to sleep with a smile on my face, I’m a happy mama.
“He settles the childless woman in her home as a happy mother of children.” – Psalm 113:9
Linnea, I could have written this blog post. My days alternate between me wanting to pull my hair out, raised voices and frustration, and me wondering how God blessed me so much, admiring their chubby little faces and marveling at being chosen for such a high calling. Thanks for the reminder that I am not alone in this.
I am so blessed the Lord has brought us together friend. And I love our boatload of children
You are a FABULOUS mother and a great encouragement to me!
I feel the same way! So glad you moved back to FL. =)
I am with you completely. Who knew how challenging it could be. Thanks for the reminder to let the good times overshadow the bad. Sometimes that makes me feel fake. I’ll try to let it just make me appreciative.